How to Blackmail a Highlander (The MacGregor Lairds) Read online

  “Because unbelievable and upsetting news should be eased into, no’ just blurted out. Besides, I dinna see how it’s the most relevant news—”

  Her mouth dropped open, and she leaned in closer. “Unbelievable and upsetting? How so? Am I so unappealing that marrying me is unthinkable?”

  Actually, quite the opposite. It was her wanting to marry him that people wouldn’t believe. But she didn’t pause long enough for him to say that, not that he would have.

  “And upsetting? Who has our marriage upset?”

  “I believe I’ve made it perfectly clear that I’m upset.”

  “Oh,” she said, waving that off with a little snort. “It’s a minor wrinkle in our plan, I’ll give you that. But upsetting is going a little far.”

  “It’s no’ going nearly far enough! Ye were a right bit criminal in getting me to bring ye all the way here and then I ended up married for my trouble? Fine way to thank a man.”

  “Well, it’s not like I planned for any of this.”

  “For someone who didna plan much, ye certainly seem to be getting yer way about everything.”

  “Not everything,” she said, pitching her voice lower and looking at him with enough suggestion in her eyes he damn near blushed.

  “And how is it not the most relevant news?” she added. “Seems to be the biggest piece of news we brought with us.”

  “Certainly the most interesting, at least,” Elizabet piped in, although neither of them was really paying attention to her.

  “I dinna ken,” Philip said. “Perhaps the fact that ye had to blackmail yer way into this mess is a better, more relevant, place to start,” he said.

  “Oh, that’s definitely the most interesting part, so far,” John said, nudging his wife.

  Philip barely heard them. He leaned toward Alice, adrenaline spiking as it always did when they verbally sparred. He was quickly coming to crave their spats. He loved to watch her eyes flash and the blood rush to her cheeks, and he couldn’t help thinking of all the other ways he could evoke that reaction from her that involved his mouth doing much more than talking.

  Alice leaned in as well, hands on her hips and eyes blazing. “Well, I wouldn’t have had to blackmail you if you’d seen reason and done the gentlemanly thing in the first place.”

  “Gentlemanly?” Philip’s laughter rang out, and John and Elizabet glanced at each other with raised brows. “First of all, I’m no gentleman and never said otherwise,” he said, raising a finger to count off his points. “Secondly, gentleman or no, I certainly have enough honor no’ to go around stealing other men’s betrothed wives just because they dinna care for the arrangement. And thirdly, given our precarious situation and the somewhat illegal status of our dear friends, I stand firm that the only one seeing any reason in this entire circumstance is me.”

  Alice sucked in an outraged breath. “Why of all the—”

  “Alice,” Elizabet cut in, leaning into their space to get their attention. “Hello,” she said with a smile when Alice finally tore her gaze from him.

  Philip blinked at Elizabet, his mind a jumble, until he looked at John, who seemed near to wetting himself with laughter. Philip scowled and sat back.

  “Perhaps you could tell us how this all came about?” Elizabet asked.

  Alice sucked in a breath for a quick retort and then blew it out again with a slight frown. “Which part?”

  “The happy occasion of yer newly wedded bliss,” John added gleefully.

  Philip glared at him, but that made John’s grin wider. He never could grasp the gravity of a situation. Or, more to the point, relished in finding amusement no matter the circumstances. In fact, he was being remarkably restrained in this particular instance. Probably out of respect for Alice. Philip had no doubt he’d be getting an earful once they were alone.

  “Well, it was a bit of an accident,” Alice said. “Philip decided he needed to guard my door throughout the night but had to step away for a few moments—”

  “And if ye had stayed put like I ordered—”

  “If you had asked instead of ordered—”

  “I did.”

  “You did not.”

  “Wait a moment,” Elizabet interrupted. “How did guarding her door turn into a marriage?”

  “Because her ladyship decided she was parched and wandered off because she couldna wait another moment for me to return with something to drink. In doing so, she was nearly attacked.”

  Elizabet’s eyes grew round, and she reached over to grasp her friend’s hand. “Were you hurt?”

  “No, no, I’m quite all right,” Alice assured her. “But the commotion caused a scene, and with Philip there and us obviously sharing the room…”

  “We declared ourselves man and wife in front of several witnesses.”

  John frowned slightly. “It’s true, the law does recognize such declarations as legally binding, if ye truly intended to be wed. In such a circumstance as yours, there shouldn’t be an issue…”

  “One of the witnesses was an acquaintance of Alice’s father, Lord Morley. And he left not long after.”

  John nodded in understanding. “Then her family will be informed of the union, irregular as it may be, except they might not be aware of that. Only that their daughter is now wed. So, to go back on it now…”

  “Would ruin her,” Philip finished.

  “Well, cheer up,” John said, slapping Philip’s knee. “Marriage isna such a hardship. Damn pleasant at times.” He gave his wife an exaggerated wink, and she rolled her eyes, though her cheeks flushed pink with pleasure.

  A servant entered and nodded at Elizabet, who stood with a smile. “Your chamber is ready.” She glanced at John, who gave her an almost imperceptible nod of his head. “Alice, how about we get you settled and leave these men to themselves for a bit?”

  Alice glanced at Philip and again, that warm spot in his heart glowed at her apparent need to look to him first. He wasn’t sure why. It certainly wasn’t because she wanted his approval or permission. Perhaps she merely wanted to know what he preferred her to do. So she could do the opposite.

  His lips twitched at the thought, and he followed John’s example and nodded. Her eyes narrowed slightly, as if she’d just realized what she’d done, but she followed Elizabet out of the room willingly enough.

  He watched her until she was out of sight and then turned to find that John had been watching him, eyebrow cocked in either amusement or confusion. Or maybe both.

  “So. Tell me how marriage is treating you,” he said. Then he burst into laughter.

  Philip groaned. “I need another drink.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Elizabet led Alice into a sparse but comfortable chamber and sat down on the bed. “All right. Now tell me what’s really going on.”

  Alice glanced at her in surprise. “We told you all.”

  “Why would you run from home? Was the man your parents chose so horrible?”

  Alice sighed and sank down next to her friend. “In some ways. Not like Mr. Ramsay, of course,” she said with a fine shudder. “But horrible all the same. His age I might have been able to deal with, although the thought of him touching me still makes me shudder. But I would have been his fourth wife. Three predecessors and no heir. Three dead predecessors, I should say. All died within a few years of marrying him and none from natural causes. All rather convenient accidents. And the comments he’d make when there was no one else to hear…” A fine tremble ran through her, and she tried to shake it off. “There’s no real evidence he’s done aught amiss. But the way he looks at me, the things he says… I’m sure the rumors are all true. Evil lurks within him, I know it.”

  “Lord Woolsmere?” Elizabet asked in a hushed tone.

  “Yes!” She seized Elizabet’s hands in her own. “You remember the gossip when you were at court.”

  “Oh, Alice,” Elizabet said. Thankfully, she grasped the horror of the situation. “I remember the whispers when he took his third wife, though I h
adn’t heard she had died as well. Did you share your fears with your parents?”

  “Of course, but they said not to put any stock in such idle gossip. And I must believe that because I know they love me and wouldn’t knowingly put me in harm’s way. Yet…how could I not be afraid for my life? The old lecher probably can’t beget a child, but that wouldn’t have stopped him from trying. And there would have been no one to keep him from becoming a widower for a fourth time if I failed to deliver an heir, which I most assuredly would have.”

  Elizabet squeezed her hand.

  “I know that is the way of things,” Alice continued, “and truthfully, if he was merely some kindhearted old man who wanted some companionship in his waning years, I don’t think I’d have minded. Much. I’d have done my duty. After all, with such a union, a little luck would have seen me a widow sooner than later.”

  Elizabet gasped but it was quickly followed by a laugh. “Ah, Alice. I’ve missed you so,” she said, leaning in for a hug.

  “I’ve missed you, too, my darling Bess,” she said, returning the hug. “I have no one in whom I can confide anymore. Aside from Rose, my maid. But it’s not the same.”

  “I know,” Elizabet said, patting her hand. “I’m so happy with John. I never knew I could be so happy. But it can be a bit lonely as well, not having another woman to tell all my darkest secrets to.” She smiled and nudged Alice’s shoulder with her own. “Sorcha is wonderful, but we still don’t know each other all that well.” She gave Alice’s hand a squeeze. “It’s good to see you.”

  “And you!” Alice said, placing her hand gently on her friend’s growing middle. “There is so much more of you to see than I expected.”

  Elizabet laughed and lovingly caressed her belly. “Yes, this was quite the surprise. Well,” she said with a laugh when Alice raised her eyebrows, “perhaps not such a surprise. After all, when one is happily married, I suppose these things tend to happen.”

  “I suppose,” Alice mimicked with a laugh. Then she sobered slightly and took both Elizabet’s hands in hers. “I would ask if you were truly happy, but I can see it radiating from you.” She pulled her friend into a hug. “And you deserve every bit of it.”

  “As do you.” Elizabet pulled away. “You always used to joke about the man you’d marry, and all your plans to cuckold him. Discreetly, of course.” She smiled gently. “And now you are here, running from your supposed grand match and married to my husband’s kinsman.”

  Elizabet searched Alice’s face. “You seem happy with your circumstances. But are you? Truly? I know the situation sounds unalterable. But if you are truly unhappy, I’m sure something can be done. Perhaps Malcolm could do something. Divorce is difficult, but possible. Unless someone objected to the union being dissolved, I doubt it has to remain permanent. In fact, if you don’t register your union and there is no objection from either of you, no one would be the wiser, I’d think. Although, if Philip did wish to continue, all he’d have to do was produce the witnesses…”

  Elizabet sighed. “It’s all a bit of a muddle that I don’t truly understand. Irregular marriages happen, of course, but not so often as you’d think. And there is a great deal of disapproval from many quarters. If you hadn’t declared yourselves wed in front of quite so many people, and then very obviously spent the night together…”

  Alice waved that off. “Nothing has happened between us. Yet.” She smiled briefly and then shrugged. “I suppose as long as I stay here, all would be well should we choose to go our separate ways. But back home, they’ve surely been told by now that I am wed. Or at least that I was observed spending the night alone in a room with a man I called husband. With Mr. Craven there to witness it all… If I were to return home, without a husband… Well, short of appearing as a widow with Philip’s body in tow, no one would ever receive me again. You know how the court is. Everyone looks the other way as long as one is discreet. Causing a scene with your paramour in front of an entire inn of curious onlookers isn’t what one would call ideal.”

  Elizabet gave her a gentle smile. “No, not exactly. But, you do have the option of staying here and dissolving the union. Short of rounding up the witnesses who were at the inn that night, there is precious little anyone could do to prove anything.”

  “True.”

  “But?” Elizabet asked.

  “I don’t know. We fight constantly. The man is insufferable. Arrogant. Demanding. Rigid. And fussy. Did you know he repacked my entire trunk on the ship? Folded everything neatly as could be because he couldn’t stand to see the clothing tossed into the trunk with no order. He packs his saddlebags the same way. Everything has to be just so. It’s aggravating. Even more so when it comes to making a decision to do something, because every action must be scrutinized and examined repeatedly before he makes a move. It’s exhausting. And he expects me to obey his every word without question.”

  “You’ve just described most men. Certainly those in this neck of the woods.”

  Alice laughed and then shrugged. “There’s something about him, Bess.”

  “Is that something worth staying married for?”

  Alice paused for a moment, thinking back over everything Philip had said and done. The way he looked at her, touched her, made her feel.

  “I think so.” She sighed. “But I have to convince him.”

  Elizabet pulled her into another hug. “Then congratulations, my dearest friend. And good luck convincing a MacGregor to change his mind. But if anyone can do it, you can.”

  “I hope so, Bess. I hope so.”

  …

  “Marriage agrees with ye,” John said, grinning when Philip scowled at him.

  “It’s no’ like I had much choice in the matter.”

  “Aye, ye did.”

  When Philip raised a brow, John repeated it. “Ye did. Though I’ll grant ye, the situation was a bit more complicated as an acquaintance of her family was present. But the lady seems happy with the arrangement. Why are ye so against it?”

  “Do ye really need to ask me that? She’s the daughter of Lord Morley. My parents, rest their souls, were good people with a bit o’ land to their names, but none so much as to put me within rights to marry a lady. Even if that werena the case, I never wanted to marry.”

  John waved that away. “Neither did I. Sometimes circumstances change.”

  “And sometimes they don’t.”

  John shrugged. “Well, the crux of the matter is that the lady’s family has most likely been informed of their daughter’s new status. So, if ye dinna wish to bring shame on the lady, then the arrangement must stand, correct?”

  “Aye,” Philip said, narrowing his eyes.

  “So, why be such a surly bastard about it?”

  That startled an amused snort out of Philip. Leave it to John to say exactly what he thought. “Because, the lady didna choose me. No’ really. She had no intention of finding herself wed to anyone, let alone the likes of me. In fact, she went to great lengths to avoid a marriage to a man she didna want.”

  “Have ye asked her what she wants now?”

  Philip snorted again. “There’s no escaping listening to what the woman wants. She’s no’ shy about speaking her mind.”

  “Well, then.”

  “She doesna ken what she really wants. She’s impetuous and bullheaded. Never met a rule she didna wish to break. Hell, she’s probably saying yes only because I’m sayin’ no. She lives to contradict my every wish and command.”

  “Ye’ve just described most women I’ve come across.”

  Philip snorted but shook his head. “Right now, being with me feels adventurous. The men she’s used to are…different. Genteel and bored and like to play games. I’m no’ sure she understands this isna a game to me. And what happens several months, or even years from now, when she decides she’s had enough of the game?”

  “Then, I suppose ye go yer separate ways. Ye wouldna be the first to do so.”

  Philip frowned at that. If their union was never regis
tered, assuming their split was amicable, there really wouldn’t be too much fuss. Even if their union was registered, divorce was a possibility, unlike with their sovereign neighbor to the south. Though it was not one many would undertake.

  Truthfully, the thought of remaining married to Alice, and all that would entail, was more enticing than he cared to admit to his kinsman. They had little choice in the matter, unless he wished to send Alice back to her family in disgrace. While sending her away held a great deal of appeal, he’d never do such a thing. And keeping her by his side held more temptation.

  He shoved those thoughts aside. “There are other matters that must be discussed.”

  John’s amusement faded, and he nodded, glancing toward the door through which the women had disappeared. “Aye. That wee bastard Ramsay.”

  Philip nodded as well. “If Alice’s family is informed where she is, and who she is with, I dinna think it will be long before Ramsay hears. While I dinna think ye’ll be connected to all this, it may give Ramsay the excuse he’s been wanting to march on Glenlyon.”

  “Aye,” John said, sitting back with a sigh. “I doubt such an action will be sanctioned by anyone, particularly the king. There are other ways to bring an errant daughter home, so Ramsay willna be able to use Lady Alice as an excuse. Then again, I dinna think that he cares overly much about the legality of his actions. He most likely willna wait to gain permission, preferring to take action and ask for forgiveness later.”

  “I took every precaution to keep my final destination secret. However…”

  John nodded. “However, Ramsay is fully aware of yer connection to me, as ye were at my side when we fought last.”

  “Aye. And when he hears Alice is with me…”

  “He’ll assume she’s going to Elizabet.”

  Philip’s frown deepened. “He doesna ken the location of Kirkenroch.”

  “True. But I dinna think he has the resources to take on Glenlyon directly. And Kirkenroch isna so far removed from Glenlyon that it couldna be found if someone were searching hard enough. We’ve taken care to hire only trusted clansmen to work on the repairs, but it’s no’ really a secret that we’re here. At least in the village.”